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A conversation like this needs to show respect and understanding in every direction.
A conversation like this needs to show respect and understanding in every direction.
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Why is homosexuality wrong but divorce isn't?
by OK to Thrash » Wed Feb 17, 2016 12:49 pm
Why does homosexuality ruin the "sanctity of marriage," but not divorce? As an ex-Christian, I am quite familiar with the few biblical verses that condemn homosexual relationships. However, I also understand that the bible forbids divorce except in the case of infidelity. Mathew 10:9 says "what God has joined together, let no one separate." So if marriage is a union by God, no man can separate it, and therefore would not be acknowledged by God (again, except in the case of infidelity). So why is divorce recognized and supported by Christians? If Christians are so concerned with protecting the sanctity of marriage, why aren't they fighting against divorce like how they fight against gay marriage?
- OK to Thrash
Re: Why is homosexuality wrong but divorce isn't?
by jimwalton » Wed Mar 30, 2016 7:40 pm
Many churches *are* against divorce, and recognize that divorce is against God's ideal and it is destructive to individuals and to society at large. The Bible allows for divorce in under certain conditions, so despite that divorce is displeasing to God, there are times when it's allowed (as in when there's been adultery, among other conditions) and when it's encouraged (when there is spousal or child abuse). I know many churches who stand very strong against divorce,and help couples in every way they can to stay together. Divorce should be the absolute last alternative after everything else has been tried, and there is no other recourse.
Homosexuality, on the other hand, is never allowed by the Bible under any conditions. Every time the Bible mentions it it is under the category of immorality and displeasing to God. Biblically there is no wiggle room for justifying it or making it OK. Though the Bible never explains why it is wrong (it doesn't describe why anything else is wrong either, for that matter), it is uncompromisingly consistent in its teaching that it is.
While some churches celebrate gay relationships in the name of love, others don't recognize them as moral because the Bible teaches that it's sinful. And while love is the greatest command, it is never given the power to change the definition of sin. And so we love each other, but still recognize what has been defined as sin in the Bible. It's not because same-sex relationships are new or scary, or because we're homophobic, but because God says it's sin. It's a moral issue, not a personal one.
The issue of divorce is a complicated one, and there is disagreement about it among Christians, because none of the texts in the Bible are meant to give a list of rules about it, but are only written as responses to certain situations or questions that have arisen. For instance, the only OT text about it is Deut. 24.1-4, in which vv. 1-3 set up a sample situation, and v. 4 is the rule. Divorce seems to have been practiced, and permitted or tolerated. The point of the text is that when a court of law rules that a divorce may take place, there must be justice and fair economic compensation. Later in Malachi God says he hates divorce, but no rules are given.
Jesus gives "grounds" for divorce in Mt. 5.31-32, but anyone can tell right away that there Jesus is neither setting any rules or grounds for divorce. The context is a section in the Sermon on the Mount, and if he's not setting rules for anger (5.22), lust (5.28), or revenge (5.39), then neither can we rightly interpret that 5.32 is rules for divorce.
Within the Jewish context, marriage vows included the three provisions of food, clothing, and love. Paul taught that these expectations were legitimate in 1 Cor. 7.3-5, 33-34. The Jews allowed for divorce when any part of the marriage vow was neglected, and Paul never teaches any differently. Paul teaches that a Christian should not abandon a non-Christian spouse, but if the non-Christian spouse were guilty of abandonment, divorce was allowed (1 Cor. 7.12-17). Putting all this together gives us a more clear picture of divorce in NT days, and can help us understand Jesus and Paul. Divorce is only allowed for a limited number of grounds that are found in the OT and affirmed in the NT:
- Adultery (In Dt. 24.1, affirmed by Jesus in Mt. 19)
- Emotional and physical neglect (In Ex. 21.10-11, affirmed by Paul in 1 Cor. 7)
- Abandonment and abused (included in neglect, as affirmed in 1 Cor. 7)
Therefore, while divorce should *never* happen, God allows it (and subsequent remarriage) when your partner breaks the marriage vows. On the other hand, God in the Bible never allows homosexuality under any conditions.
Christians are very concerned to protect the sanctity of marriage, but divorce and same-sex marriage are in different categories.
Homosexuality, on the other hand, is never allowed by the Bible under any conditions. Every time the Bible mentions it it is under the category of immorality and displeasing to God. Biblically there is no wiggle room for justifying it or making it OK. Though the Bible never explains why it is wrong (it doesn't describe why anything else is wrong either, for that matter), it is uncompromisingly consistent in its teaching that it is.
While some churches celebrate gay relationships in the name of love, others don't recognize them as moral because the Bible teaches that it's sinful. And while love is the greatest command, it is never given the power to change the definition of sin. And so we love each other, but still recognize what has been defined as sin in the Bible. It's not because same-sex relationships are new or scary, or because we're homophobic, but because God says it's sin. It's a moral issue, not a personal one.
The issue of divorce is a complicated one, and there is disagreement about it among Christians, because none of the texts in the Bible are meant to give a list of rules about it, but are only written as responses to certain situations or questions that have arisen. For instance, the only OT text about it is Deut. 24.1-4, in which vv. 1-3 set up a sample situation, and v. 4 is the rule. Divorce seems to have been practiced, and permitted or tolerated. The point of the text is that when a court of law rules that a divorce may take place, there must be justice and fair economic compensation. Later in Malachi God says he hates divorce, but no rules are given.
Jesus gives "grounds" for divorce in Mt. 5.31-32, but anyone can tell right away that there Jesus is neither setting any rules or grounds for divorce. The context is a section in the Sermon on the Mount, and if he's not setting rules for anger (5.22), lust (5.28), or revenge (5.39), then neither can we rightly interpret that 5.32 is rules for divorce.
Within the Jewish context, marriage vows included the three provisions of food, clothing, and love. Paul taught that these expectations were legitimate in 1 Cor. 7.3-5, 33-34. The Jews allowed for divorce when any part of the marriage vow was neglected, and Paul never teaches any differently. Paul teaches that a Christian should not abandon a non-Christian spouse, but if the non-Christian spouse were guilty of abandonment, divorce was allowed (1 Cor. 7.12-17). Putting all this together gives us a more clear picture of divorce in NT days, and can help us understand Jesus and Paul. Divorce is only allowed for a limited number of grounds that are found in the OT and affirmed in the NT:
- Adultery (In Dt. 24.1, affirmed by Jesus in Mt. 19)
- Emotional and physical neglect (In Ex. 21.10-11, affirmed by Paul in 1 Cor. 7)
- Abandonment and abused (included in neglect, as affirmed in 1 Cor. 7)
Therefore, while divorce should *never* happen, God allows it (and subsequent remarriage) when your partner breaks the marriage vows. On the other hand, God in the Bible never allows homosexuality under any conditions.
Christians are very concerned to protect the sanctity of marriage, but divorce and same-sex marriage are in different categories.
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