by jimwalton » Sun Apr 02, 2023 4:11 pm
When you feel alone, you feel so vulnerable and lost. It's like you don't matter. It's difficult to get past that because even when people pay attention to us or even reach out to us, we feel unworthy and often disregard their compassion and friendship.
You think that suicide will end those feelings, but it's been my experience that these feelings eventually pass. It's a pit you're in, not a permanent place. I was at one time in a severe depression for about 3 years, and suicidal for a brief part of the worst part of that valley. I couldn't escape the perception that I was worthless, a complete waste of human flesh, and there was no reason to keep living. One day I came to the realization that was a lie straight from the pit of Hell. God says differently than my self-assessment; He says we are valuable in His sight, and He loves us. I realized I was tormenting myself with the worst possible lie and convincing myself that I was a completely futile human being. It still took me awhile after that realization to stop thinking that way, and it still invades my mind on occasion, but it's a vicious lie.
When you feel alone, you feel so vulnerable and lost. It's like you don't matter. It's difficult to get past that because even when people pay attention to us or even reach out to us, we feel unworthy and often disregard their compassion and friendship.
You think that suicide will end those feelings, but it's been my experience that these feelings eventually pass. It's a pit you're in, not a permanent place. I was at one time in a severe depression for about 3 years, and suicidal for a brief part of the worst part of that valley. I couldn't escape the perception that I was worthless, a complete waste of human flesh, and there was no reason to keep living. One day I came to the realization that was a lie straight from the pit of Hell. God says differently than my self-assessment; He says we are valuable in His sight, and He loves us. I realized I was tormenting myself with the worst possible lie and convincing myself that I was a completely futile human being. It still took me awhile after that realization to stop thinking that way, and it still invades my mind on occasion, but it's a vicious lie.